User talk:Raj2

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Negative thoughts come to my mind

Question: If we have negative thoughts about harming another person is it okay to do so? Do we have a free will or is it hukam from God that we should harm another person?

Reply: We have free will and accordingly we make numerous choices every few minutes; this is happening all the time and these decisions will result in our "karmas" and our karmas will governs what happens to us in the future. You cannot always control the thought that come to your mind - so if you have bad thoughts, don't blame yourself; it your mind playing tricks. But never follow any bad thoughts that you get in your mind. Your actions are under your control so exercise control and always act in a positive way. When you start acting positively, the "shataan" in the mind will be subdued and you will get less and less negative thoughts.

Live a positive life; do sewa and simran; remember God and less negative thoughts will come to the mind. I hope this short reply helps. Kind regards, Hari Singhtalk 21:22, 11 March 2013 (CDT)

Further thoughts - Reply to your question

Thank you for replying to my question quickly. I feel guilty doing simran because i feel as if gods bringing these thoughts to my mind about harming other people.Is god creating these thoughts?Am i in control of my own mind(free will)?Or is god in control of my mind and he creates such thoughts or any thoughts(both positive and negative thoughts)?The reason why i ask this is because people say that god does everything.i also feel guilty to do simran because i feel that maybe god is punishing me for doing bad deeds ,in my past life,and as a consequence, he is punishing me by making me have these thoughts.I am struggling with these thoughts and its hard for me to get these thoughts out of my head.

Reply

The mind is a tool; a melting pot; many thoughts will well up in the mind. From these thoughts one needs to make a choice. It is up to your will to exercise control and guide the mind in the right direction - only do those things that are right and lead you to a better and more sacred position. Here is where the guidance of the Guru is useful. Make your mind follow the path laid down by the Guru.

All sorts of thoughts come to everyone but the wise person will only select to follow the righteous path. The weak person or the devious person or the evil person will make the incorrect choice.

Yes, everything happens by the will of God. Earthquakes, tornado, tsunamis, etc all are the works of God. However, people commit murders, rapes and other crimes - God doesn't do these. Man has the ability to make a choice but many due to their own weaknesses cannot make the right choices.

However, even these crimes committed by mankind have been predicted by the saints; when one forgets the Lord, then he becomes weak. The Guru Granth Sahib tells us clearly that weak humans will not follow the path of Dharam (righteousness). [www.srigranth.org/servlet/gurbani.gurbani?Action=Page&Param=1362&english=t&id=58204 O Lord! When the mortal forgets the Lord of the Universe, the Sovereign Lord King, he grows weaker day by day. (14)]

So remember the supreme Lord and stay strong and allows try and make the right choices! Kind regards, Hari Singhtalk 00:16, 15 March 2013 (CDT)

Third dialogue

Thank you for replying back to my email, I truly appreciate it. I am very grateful because you have taught me so much and that is something that I will never truly forget. I was also wondering that if god tells us that we should live a truthful life then how am i living a truthful life. God states that we should be honest and truthful, but I feel that I am not truthful and honest because I am not telling other people (family) the thoughts I get about harming others because I am afraid that they may dislike me,or that they might have negative thoughts towards me? The only person who knows about such thoughts are you and a psychiatrist that I see on a weekly basis. Am I living a honest and truthful life? I feel that I am not living a truthful and honest life because I am not telling other people how I feel inside and i'm not acting on those thoughts so that means that I am acting as a fake and not acting truthfully? In other words, I must be a fake person since I am not acting on my thoughts and I am not telling my family that I have these negative thoughts, so therefore I must be dishonest and fake?I hope you can reply back and thank you for everything that you have done for me words cannot express how grateful I feel that you have taken time out of your day to respond to my questions.

Reply

Its a pleasure to answer your questions. I also learn from the thing that you tell me; so we are both gaining from the exercise.

Yes, you should be honest and truthful but that does not mean you go around telling everyone the password to your bank account! To be honest is not deceive another person; not to deliberately misguide another person; to not rob another person; to protect and guard anyone is weaker than you, etc. So if you are not transparent, it does not mean you are not honest. You don't tell your family because you do not want to hurt them - that is a good reason not to tell them.

The thoughts that you get in your mind are probably a result of insecurity or trauma or previous shock that you may have suffered; getting medical help is the first point of call. Follow their instructions. Modern medical solutions work most of the time. Dedicate your energy to the medical help that you are getting; work with these experts with vigor and strength.

Also form a bond with God. Everyday spend 5 to 10 minutes in meditation and yoga; learn to calm down the activity in your mind; connect with Gurbani and the Guru. In your heart do an ardas to God to ask for his help directly; be frank and passionate with your ardas; tell God you are His creation and you want his help resolving this problem. "God, I am your son, please help me; bring inner peace and calmness to my mind. Blow away all the negative thoughts"

Slowly your mind will start to have less and less negative thoughts. As this happens increase your connection with God; believe in the bani of Guru Nanak. Remind yourself how the power of bani was able to stop the huge mountain rock with the palm of the Guru's hand at Nankana Sahib.

Share your problem with one than two of your closest friends/family. But choose them careful - you want someone who will support you not create more pressure. First explain just a little of your minor thoughts; if they support you than slowly introduce more difficult issues but tread gentle and only move at a very gentle pace when you are certain and confident of their support.

If you select the right person to begin sharing your problem, you will find relief and the size of the problem in your mind will diminish very quickly.

May the Guru bless you. Kind Regards, Hari Singhtalk 20:29, 21 March 2013 (CDT)

4th dialogue

Thank you for making me feel comfortable talking to you, I feel that you have immensely helped me.Thank you for giving me great advice as to how I can openly share my thoughts with other people whom I trust. I am glad that your learning something from me as well. I was a bit unclear about being truthful (Sat). So to make sure I am following you, an individual does not have to always tell/share with others what thoughts, or what actions that come to our mind to live a truthful life. Since we all have strange thoughts that come to all of us, we do not have to share every thought ,or actions that come to mind with others to live a truthful life (Sat)?We must also control any negative thoughts and actions, so that we do not take any wrong actions. I just felt that I was not being truthful, or real because I was not acting on the thoughts or actions that were coming to my mind.I was also wondering where do all of these thoughts come from in our mind both negative or positive? Do thoughts come from experiences, knowledge, and other stimuli in our environment?Thank you for everything once again, The advice and the knowledge you are giving me is something that I will never forget. May god bless you and make all of your wishes and dreams come true. Regards, Raj

Reply

Thank you for your kind words; it is through the guidance and blessings of Gurbani that we can lead a useful and truthful life.

To live a truthful life is to act righteously - it is your actions that matter. We all have negative thoughts and we try to train yourselves not to act on these negative waves of the mind. Always act on your positive thoughts. When you start doing this, more blessing will come to you and more positive thought will result.

Truthful living is doing the right things. We cannot completely controlled the mind - its like a bird; flying from one tree to another. But use your will power to only act on the right thoughts and hence you will be doing only right things and living truthfully.

Sharing all your thoughts does not come into the equation - share only positive things and do not dwell on any negative thoughts - change the subject when your mind wants to think negative! - Say no and move to a positive subject - think about the great things that the Gurus' did - the positive change that the Gurus brought to the lives of the people of Punjab and elsewhere. I think you now understand what is truthful living.

No one can explain the workings of the mind. All we know is that many thousands of thoughts come to the mind every day; some good and some bad. Our mission on this planet is to only follow positive thoughts and reject the negative ones. We have to learn to make the correct selection every time. That is our mission in life - to make the correct choices.

God bless; Guru's blessings. Hari Singhtalk 19:22, 25 March 2013 (CDT)

Fifth Dialogue

Thank you for making me understand what truthful living is. I will do the best I can to be a good person and to always follow the positive thoughts and not to be follow the negative thoughts. I believe I am scared of the negative thoughts that come to my mind and that is why they bother me so much. You have really helped me and gave me the guidance and that is something that I truly appreciate. I hope you can leave this blog/page up on your site, so then I can always come and visit the page and always remind myself of how to lead a better life. May god bless you, you are truly a genuine and caring person and that is rare to find these days. I wish you and your family all the best and I hope all of your wishes and dreams come true. Regards, Raj. P

Reply

Many thanks for your very kind words and your good wishes; I don't think I deserve such kind words as I am just following the guidance of my Guru as best as I can; and I don't think I am completely there yet in obeying the complete and bitter sweet Hukam of Guru Nanak. However, I am very grateful for your generosity and frank praise. I hope I will continue to be a servant of Guru Nanak. May your good words help propel me even more nearer to the state of understanding of Gurbani to which I continue to aspire to and which at present eludes me.

May the Almighty give you the strength to remain focused and always alert so that you can faithfully follow the positive impulses that come to your mind. Rely on the Guru and seek his guidance when you are unsure. This page will remain for as long as the website prevails - hopefully forever!

Many thanks also for your good wishes to my family and me. I too wish you and your family good health and a most satisfying life and may all the real jewels in this world be yours. Please do come back and post question whenever something troubles you. Wishing you every success in your life. Regards, Hari Singhtalk 22:13, 28 March 2013 (CDT)

=Thank you very much, once again words cannot express how grateful I feel that you have taken time out of your day and have provided me with great information. I wish for all of your dreams and wishes to come true;you are a great person. I was wondering that one of the evils in life is attachment. I was wondering if you can provide me more detail as to how attachment is seen as something that is bad. I thought being attached to your family or loved ones is a good thing? So, being attached to your family and loving them is not a good thing? Another evil is Krodh (wrath or rage) I was wondering if you can explain the following quote in simple language..."Violence, attachment, covetousness and wrath," says Guru Nanak "are like four rivers of fire; those who fall in them burn, and can swim across, O Nanak, only through God's grace" (GG, 147). What does it mean by, "those who fall in them burn and can swim across...only through gods grace"? Does that mean that some people will not be punished for there wrong or violent actions? Thank you very much. Kind regards, Raj